Today's award goes to a Colorado man who wanted to bar hop while he was drunk...and decided to take his lawn mower. Police spotted Kenneth cruising along a busy road on his riding mower, after he had visited multiple bars. Police say he showed signs of intoxication and didn't have a driver's license. What I love most about this story is Kenneth's excuse: He said he was just trying to mow down the weeds...that happened to growing from bar to bar. Riiiiiight.