Clear99 Today's Best Country

A 25-year-old man in New York named Shawn is charged with reckless endangerment after he agreed to shoot his friend in the leg.  Apparently his genius friend repeatedly asked him to shoot him so he’d “know what it felt like”. So Shawn gave in and shot him with a .22-caliber rifle. His friend was taken to the hospital and is expected to recover and Shawn got a $10,000 bail. Hey moron who wanted to be shot….it sucked, didn’t it?

Another criminal caught because he left something incriminating at the scene of the crime.  An 18-year-old from Utah burglarized an elderly couples home.  Police found an abandoned backpack in the backyard.  In that backyard was the kid’s homework with his name on it.  Cops went to his house and found him with evidence linking him to the crime, so they arrested him.

Talk about a stupid fight.  A 54-year-old man in South Carolina stabbed his friend during an argument over which of them could have more sex. The argument started when Calvin Hill and his friend were in the backseat of a car together…then it turned into a tussle…then the friend ended up being stabbed.  Calvin claims the friend stabbed himself, but the cops aren’t buying it – he’s being charged with assault and battery.

No matter what, there’s always a dumbass who doesn’t understand the purpose of the 911 system.  Today it’s Michael Skopen of Illinois.  He’s been sentenced to one year probation and a $1,000 fine after he called 911 five times to complain about his iPhone not working. FIVE times. And to top it off, when police arrived, he resisted arrist and is charged with that too.

Where’s the last place in the world you should try to rob? Today’s dumbass picked a police station.  18-year-old Keithan Manuel went into the police department in Wilmer, Texas with a towel covering his hands and demanded money.  The dispatcher at the front desk said, “You know I have a gun, right?” Officers came out and arrested Keithan immediately and he’s still in jail. Keithan claims he was “just kidding.”

We’ve heard of drunk parents letting their underage kids drive, but today’s dumbass duo in Fort Wayne, Indidana take the cake.  A witness saw a man and woman tie 4 kids down to the hood of their car and hit the open road as they were leaving a liquor store. They made it three blocks before a US Marshal spotted the car and stopped them. The kids were aged 4 to 7 years old.  The man was arrested for DWI

When you rob a bank, you might want to remember to take the cash with you.  A man went into a Citibank in Chicago and claimed that he had a bomb with him and demanded money.  The teller put the money in a bag, and the robber took off without it. Police are still looking for him. Doh!!

From the “You Can’t Get Much Lower Than That” Department: 27-year-old Jamie Toler of Phoenix is charged with fraud after telling people she needed money for cancer treatment and using it to buy breast implants.  Jamie told her former boss, mother and grandparents she needed cash for a double mastectomy and reconstructive surgery because she didn’t have insurance….and she even helped organize fundraisers.  She collected more than 8 grand total. Police found out her medical records showed she did not have cancer and she used the money to pay a plastic surgeon for implants.

Today’s dumbass award goes to the police in Shelbyville, Tennessee because they made a bogus arrest recently.  A guy named Lorenzo went into a convenience store and paid with a $50 bill.  The clerk said a marker used to detect false money did not show that the bill was real, so he called police. The cops showed up and  threw Lorenzo in jail for using conterfeit money. Turns out the bill was real – it was just old and didn’t react to the marker.  Whoops! Lorenzo was let go and police apologized to him.

Parent of the Year Award goes to Patricia Krentcil of new Jersey.  She’s in court facing charges that she took her 5-year-old daughter into a stand-up tanning booth, where authorities say the girl suffered severe burns. Patricia is charged with child endangerment…New Jersey law prohibits anyone under the age of 14 from using tanning salons. And as for Patricia, she’s tanned herself so dark that she looks like a walking coffee table….yikes!