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Daily Dumbass Jan. 24, 2020

Some people are too embarrassed to buy what they want from an adult store, so they just steal it instead.  A 23-year-old guy named Jaquan went into an adult store in Houston and stole a ton of lingerie, lube, beads, and a penis pump called the “fireman pump”….over $1,000 worth …

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Daily Dumbass Jan. 23, 2020

If you think a bumper sticker can mask your stupidity, think again.  There’s a 56-year-old guy named Sergio in Largo, Florida, and he has a bumper sticker that says, “Don’t Drink And Drive.”  You probably already see where this is going.  The other night, he was driving his truck and …

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Daily Dumbass Jan. 22, 2020

A moron in Cali makes it easy for the cops to do their job. A thief near San Diego grabbed $80,000 in gold necklaces from a jewelry store and ran out of the store.  But cops know who he is because his FANNY PACK got snagged on the door…and fell …

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Daily Dumbass Jan. 21, 2020

If there’s an award for worst son, I’d like to nominate today’s dumbass.  A 28-year-old grown ass man named Thomas in Georgia is facing charges after he kept stealing his 73-year-old mom’s electronics, and holding them for RANSOM.  What was he demanding? That she give him money or else he …

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Daily Dumbass Jan. 20, 2020

Here’s one from the “How could you forget THAT” File.  A guy in Scotland named Matthew tried to rob a bank using a pillow case as a mask…but he forgot to cut eye holes in it.  He had to take the pillow case off during the robbery so he could …

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Daily Dumbass Jan. 17, 2020

Today’s dumbass from Virginia definitely has a serious malfunction.  A 39-year-old named Octavious went into a Taco Bell and tried to order off the dollar menu, but he only had 70 cents.  An employee felt sorry for him and gave him a free taco. Then Octavious got super mad over …

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Daily Dumbass Jan. 15, 2020

When Viagra just won’t cut it, sometimes dumbasses get desperate. A guy in Mexico went to the hospital recently because he had taken a sexual stimulant that’s used to breed BULLS, and let’s just say he had been engorged for 3 days. Doctors had to operate on him to help …

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Daily Dumbass Jan. 14, 2020

Today’s dumbass is off to a pitiful start in 2020.  A 30-year-old named Nathaniel in Georgia broke into a tire store last week.  While he was trying to steal tires, he somehow got trapped under a pile of them and couldn’t get free.  So he called 911 on himself for …

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Daily Dumbass Jan. 13, 2020

Put this one under the “you shouldn’t need to tell people this” category.  Apparently some people have been using toothpaste as LUBE and posting about their traumatic experiences online…including things like rashes, irritation, and even burns on their junk.  So now doctors are warning people to not put toothpaste “down …

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Daily Dumbass Jan. 10, 2020

We all pretty much expect to wait in long lines at the DMV….except for today’s dumbass.  A 28-year-old woman named Shawna in New Jersey, got so frustrated while waiting in line at the DMV that she started beating up the employees and then she smashed $23,000 worth of computers and …

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