Another entertaining wanna be thief in Florida for the first dumbass of the week. Police in Orlando got a call about a guy trying to buy jewelry with a stolen debit card. The guy’s name is Jose, and when he saw cops coming, he tried to hide the evidence…by EATING the debit card. And yes, you guessed it – that’s not possible – so he wasn’t able to swallow is before the cops stopped him. If that wasn’t bad enough, Jose then quickly announced that he had a big bag of cocaine in his pocket. Officers also found 13 other stolen credit and debit cards on him along with the blow, so yeah – an astounding amount of bad choices in one day – even for Florida.